I am Jamaica's husband, Foursquare's comm director, Personality's founder, and a catalyst for CFCC.
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June 1, 2004
Hey Me: Take a Chill Pill
Filed under: Media
I need to learn how to rest. For the last 38 hours, I had nothing that needed to be accomplished. My wife is out of town. I had no looming deadlines. No house to clean (already done). No laundry to wash (the basket just isn't full enough). Of course there are plenty of things on my "get-a-round-to-it" list, but for all intents and purposes, my time was officially free; a rarity that occurs about as often as Hailey's Comet. So I decided to use my time unlike I ever had before and did nothing. This is hard for me. I'm a thinker, a dreamer, a planner. I'm the guy who thinks about the next big thing to tackle in life and then get depressed because I find other people doing it better than I ever could.
I can't chill.
I tried surfing mindlessly on the Internet, but that just led to all my bookmarked shortcuts - news, business blogs, email - not Web sites to chill with at all.
I tried reading, but since I'm not much of a "novel" reader, I defaulted to design magazines and business journals which I love, but they just got me thinking again, not chilling. I did read the Bible, but this book isn't an easy read. I was either being rebuked in Proverbs for too much rest or challenged in the book of James to get out and help people.
I watched a movie that was really good, but it only lasted 110 minutes of the 2,280 minutes I have to chill. I caught a few moments of ABC's movie of the week, Patch Adams. Great movie, but again, made me feel guilty for not going to med school to be a doctor and go volunteer with Patch in helping people.
I can't chill.
I ended up spending the majority of my time watching television. I don't usually watch much TV, although there is an occasional special or show I'll catch if I'm around. (Last night was the hour-long 60 Minutes interview with Bill Clinton.) The rest of what I watched was absolute nothingness. It was not engaging. It was not funny. It was not sad. It was not boring. It was not anything. It was everything I expected and nothing I needed. It did not relax me. It made my mind think about things it shouldn't: I'm overweight, I'm boring, I'm unattractive, I'm better, I'm funnier, I'm horny.
Today is Monday. I am not rested or relaxed. Did I get nothing out of the last 38 hours other than a blog entry? I need to learn how to rest.
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